In all honesty, I have quite a bit to be thankful for.
This August, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Most people ask me how I cope with these, given I’m the most active person they know. They know me as the runner, the dancer, the swimmer, the girl who never stops reaching for her goals. And I’m still that person. Those things keep me feeling like “me.” That’s what I tell them. What I don’t tell them is that it’s better than the alternative. In February, they thought I had cancer. My diagnoses weren’t death sentences. They were a gift.
I started a new medication this fall. It’s called Cymbalta. Most people know it as an anti-depressant. It’s also been really successful for people with fibromyalgia, as was the case for me. I didn’t know how bad I was feeling until a month after I began taking it. Along with reduced symptoms, my head became much clearer. I became happier. I didn’t realize that it was possible to love life as much as I do now. When I think back to how dark the days prior to this diagnosis were, I cringe at how miserable I was feeling. But I don’t regret it, because I appreciate life so much more, and knowing where I’ve been helps me be better at my job and as a person in general.
I credit this happiness to more than just the diagnoses and the medication. I have a job that makes me excited to get up in the mornings. I’m studying what I love. And I have new aspirations of what I want to do with my future. The possibilities are endless. That is what people have been telling me for years, but I didn’t understand this until a few months ago. I work an amazing job at an excellent school where I have support from family and friends. And now that I am at my best, I get to help others be their best, too.
So despite all of the nastiness that comes along with being a “full time sick person,” my illnesses have me waking up every day filled with gratitude and hope. I’m excited to see what opportunities the day will bring and to conquer my world one step at a time. Some days, that only means getting out of bed and getting dressed. Other days, it’s running a half marathon. But whatever it means, I’m continuously thankful for another day in this life I live :)
